August 25, 2022 | by Marc Cebrian

I admit that the article published yesterday was not my best work.

Part 388 was boredom-rich, so I cut out half of the article because I realized, “He’s repeating the same garbage he always does.”

You know you have hit rock bottom when even a staunch critic shrugs off most of 78 minutes.

Well, David C. Pack must have bugged my apartment because Part 389 of “The Greatest Unending Story!” did not disappoint. He brought the juice and it is so worth the squeeze.

It was a breath of fresh air that I was so fascinated with, I had to listen to the first 11 minutes twice. Join me on this rewarding journey as we examine “biblical distortion” on a whole new level.

Spoiler Alert: David C. Pack apologizes
for setting dates during the last seven minutes.

Establishing a specific concept is necessary to address how David C. Pack spends the first 20 minutes of Part 389 in the Gospel of Luke to make one point.

The enablers on the third floor know what I am about to write is of no lie and of no distortion. Many former ministers have their own tales to tell to confirm this.

David C. Pack has the most astonishing piss-poor reading comprehension skills of any human being I have ever heard.

That is not an opinion or an exaggeration. It is a hard, cold fact of history.

The Enabler-in-Chief, Stepford Prime, Dr. Feelbad, Chicago Heavy, and the rest of the defeated “ministers” at Headquarters can only shrug and say, “That is true…” Do not believe me? Ask them.

Dave has a preternatural ability to read something and fully misunderstand it. Perhaps hitting that car windshield when he was a kid did more permanent damage than he realizes.

So much of this endless prophecy series is based on reading a verse in the Bible and fully not getting the point. I sat in the Main Hall and marveled when Dave would read something and get it so terribly wrong. So obviously terribly wrong.

If he were ever tested by a clinician, his entire world would collapse in on itself. Talk about a cascade of mental failure.

Here are just two examples from the Old Testament.

“I’m rushing to call it out” is one of Dave’s favorite repeated phrases. He has built an entire prophetic theology propped up by a pathological reading comprehension deficit.

Habakkuk 2:2.
And the LORD answered me, and said,  Write the vision, and make it plain upon tables, that  he may run that readeth it.

Note the keyword "that" between "make plain" and "he may run" – this is a qualifier and it is there in the Hebrew. Removing words from the verse corrupts the meaning. That is a classic Dave Pack move.

(H4616) ma’an
“properly heed, that is, purpose; used only adverbially, on account of (as a motive or an aim), teleologically in order that: - because of, to the end (intent) that” 

Do this SO THAT this may happen. Dave always leaves the word "that" and it's meaning out of his mental equation. He often explains that he is “rushing” AND “making it plain” when the verse proves it is talking about two separate people.

Habakkuk writes the vision upon a tablet. Someone else reads it while rushing past the tablet.

The Dave interpretation is, “I’m making it plain and rushing to call it out.”

The real interpretation is, "Make it so simple, Habakkuk, that someone else running past it can read it."

Which is more plausible and fits the entire context of the verses around it?

Option A) David C. Pack is a type of Habakkuk that is being instructed by God to “rush calling out a vision” only to the members of the Restored Church of God just before the return of Jesus Christ who cannot return until His message is finished but Dave can never tell when exactly the vision is complete so he has to keep adding parts to the series he thought was over the day before.

Or

Option B) Habakkuk was to write down the message God gave from His lips to his ears making it so simple that someone rushing past it can understand it without stopping.

An entire pillar of Dave’s prophetic specialness is built on re-interpreting one vivid passage of how simple God wants His prophet Habakkuk to make something known.

This has bugged me for years. The more Dave repeats his misunderstanding, the more "factual" it has become inside RCG and the more "habitual" it is for the brethren and "ministers" to just accept it.

One other inset of an obvious biblical misreading that Dave will quote from time to time comes to us via 1 Samuel.

1 Samuel 2:35
And I will raise me up a faithful priest,  that shall do  according to that which is in mine heart  and in my mind:  and I will build him a sure house;  and he shall walk  before mine anointed or ever.

The first time Dave corrupted this verse to mean it was talking about Elijah (rather, talking about himself as Elijah), my chest burned with disgust. Each time after that, it was a prick of irritation.

"Obviously, that's Elijah," he said one day. And that was it. "Who else would it be?" I wanted to leap out of my chair and shout, "Samuel! God is about to introduce Samuel! Samuel the prophet. Samuel the priest. In the Book of Samuel.”

Yes, Dave did give more “proof” than that but it was all circular logic rather than solid Bible evidence.

“That’s Elijah,” would pop out of his mouth from time to time and just move on with the assumption he proved it to the church by simply stating it. True Christian doctrine is not built that way.

This verse was no prophecy for an end-time figure to fulfill. God was letting Eli know that his two sons would die because they disgraced the office of priest in the temple (1 Samuel 2:34) and that after them, a man would be raised to be “a faithful priest.”

Not David C. Pack as Elijah, but Samuel. Need proof? Two verses later, we read this:

1 Samuel 3:1
And the child Samuel ministered unto the LORD before  Eli.

The rest of the book goes on to show Samuel as “a faithful priest” as God told Eli would happen.

That is all for now or we would be here all day. I could write my own booklet giving examples of how David C. Pack misreads a verse and then presents it in a way to fit his current narrative. Once he thinks it is talking about him, he will repeat it as a fact for years on end.

But since I am not a complete jerk-face and I do not hate David C. Pack personally, I am going to recommend he visit the EnglishMatic website which has some great Reading Comprehension Tests for him to practice with.

After he passes the 8th Grade test, then maybe he can get his Bible back. Maybe.

Dave has built a prophetic career on misreading verses that build to a false narrative.

He just did this in a spectacular fashion with Part 387. Leviticus 26:18 “…I will punish you seven times more for your sins” in Dave-speak meant, “I will punish you one week for your sins.” Even he walked that one back pretty quickly. But the fact he did it at all makes the point.

Why is the Series going on for so long?
Why is Mr. Pack saying “The Mystery of God” is over when it never is?
Why is Mr. Pack always changing his teachings?
Why is prophecy so confusing for the past few years?
Why are the dates he tells us of Christ’s return coming and going without it happening?

So many questions inside The Restored Church of God can be answered with a single statement.

David C. Pack has the most astonishing piss-poor reading comprehension skills of any human being I have ever heard.

This lengthy foundation was necessary to fully appreciate the first “bombshell” Dave presents in Part 389 that Jesus Christ was not born in the fall. It is all rubbish. It is a figment of Dave’s imagination. It is wrong and he is wrong for doing it.

The opening of the message was clipped, but from what we could hear, rcg.org was under some type of cyber attack keeping Bradford G. Schleifer from attending. I could imagine him spending 10-minutes to solve the problem and enjoying the rest of the 47-minutes being productive in his office.

Brad needs to steal as much "downtime" away from Dave as possible in order to keep his sanity.

@ 00:55 I wanna give you a remarkable story. Kind of a bonus story and truth that no one has known until now. You’ll be the first people to understand it. We’re gonna read carefully through much of Luke 1.

While going through all of Luke 1, Dave teaches the members of RCG something they have known since the time of Herbert W. Armstrong but presents the information as if it is a new discovery “just in time” before the return of Jesus Christ.

We already knew Mary was pregnant when she visited Elisabeth.

He also educates the church that life begins at conception! Catholics everywhere just dropped their tea.

Hurry up and visit the Questions and Answers section (https://rcg.org/questions/p002.a.html) about Christ’s birth before they purge it for being heresy. The last paragraph is key.

It is as if a veil of ignorance has fallen upon David C. Pack starting in 2015 in which he can no longer remember what everyone in the church already knew and his “ministers” were too embarrassed to point that out.

Is this phenomenon of God or a childhood head injury or both?

Dave wants to prove how Jesus Christ was not born in the fall, but in the spring. This would further validate Elul 1 as being the beginning of the Kingdom of God with the Day of the Lord starting on the Feast of Trumpets 30 days later.

Luke 1:24 “…Elisabeth conceived and hid herself five months…”
Luke 1:26 “And in the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent from God…”
Luke 1:36 “…and this is the sixth month with her,  who was called barren.”
Luke 1:56 “And Mary abode with her about three months…”
Luke 1:57 “Now Elisabeth's full time came that she should be delivered; and she brought forth a son.”

@ 06:42 So, hidden five months, this is the sixth month. Because in this sixth month, He came. So, we’re in the sixth month meaning we’re saying twice we’re in Elul.

He re-interprets the scriptures in Luke 1 noting the pregnancy of Elisabeth, John the Baptist’s mother, as proof by taking the months mentioned to be from the Hebrew calendar and not from the pregnancy gestation period.

Because Dave is so busy “rushing” he does not take the time to read the verses carefully and avoid all the future blushing that will occur when he moonwalks this teaching later.

Taking another look at Luke 1, we can apply some of the 12 Rules of Bible Study.

3) Prove All Things
6) Examine The Context
8) The Bible Interprets Itself

“Elisabeth conceived and hid herself five months” (Not in the fifth month of Av, but a duration)
“And in the sixth month” (Established in :24 as “conception” months confirmed in :36)
“the sixth month with her” (“with her” proves it is a month as her being the fulcrum)
“Mary abode with her about three months” “Elisabeth’s full time came”

A conception. A newly-pregnant Mary visits Elisabeth who is six months pregnant. Nine months are accounted for. John the Baptist is born. No mention of Av or Elul. End of story.

The first 20 minutes of this message is all about Jesus Christ being conceived on Elul 1 using a misunderstanding of what “months” were being referred to in Luke 1:24, :26, :36, :56-57.

@ 09:36 But what Gabriel prophesied about Christ sitting on David’s throne which we just happen to know will happen for the first time on Elul 1. Curiously, really near when He was conceived. Now this will grow more important. Possibly, the very same day He was conceived. Watch this.

Note the circular logic. The point is a fact because it needs to be a fact to make the point.

@ 14:10 When would Christ have been born? If He was conceived on Elul 1 or thereabouts. Maybe exactly. Maybe thereabouts. Then He would’ve been born on Sivan 1 before Pentecost. It’s impossible to argue with this math.

Here is how to argue with this math. It is not a nine-month count that is in dispute, but how the question is formed. I think we have sufficiently beaten that reading comprehension horse to death by now.

But in case Dave reads this article, I want to “make plain” that the Luke 1 verses describing the birth of John the Baptist have mention of the months of pregnancy gestation, not Hebrew months on a calendar.

For anyone interested in the topic of Bible Study, I recommend The World to Come “The 12 Rules of Bible Study” Part 1 and Part 2. I worked on these videos and still think they are doctrinally sound.

It is ironic that the man presenting the material no longer obeys these rules himself because if he had, everyone inside The Restored Church of God could have been spared years of confusion and heresy.

@ 14:44 It’s impossible. He had to be born in the spring. Now, you can sort of do the math. Had to be born in the spring. So, He was conceived around Elul 1. That’s inarguable. Therefore, He was born just before Pentecost near Sivan 1.

Dave takes the assumption ball and runs up the field full-steam with it. In the wrong direction. Repeating a statement makes it fact.

A craftsman who has a ruler, level, and measuring tape can still really botch things if he does not know what he is doing. He can do all the math correctly but the measurements can still be wrong.

Dave's biblical measurements are all wrong. I guarantee you this "Christ was born in the spring" will have the shelf life of a carton of eggs. I advise Ed to not start rewriting the literature just yet. Maybe put that on your "long-term” to-do list and tackle it after Trumpets.

He then uses his “new” information that God considers you a person at conception by taking a shot at birthday-keeping. WCG and RCG have both strained so hard at making this celebration demonic.

Dave makes a point that God counts our age from conception and not birth, so therefore why even bother to celebrate a birthday when God says that is an invalid number by nine months?

It is called a “birth day” not a “conception day,” Dave. God may consider someone a full person at conception, but human beings rejoice when they come out of the womb.

And he just admitted that the Bible and the concept of birthdays have nothing to do with each other. Maybe RCG should consider birthdays like they do Thanksgiving. A non-religious tradition celebrating the thankfulness of life. But only an antichrist serpent would think such a thing.

The birthday-conception point does not go to waste.

@ 19:08 This becomes yet another indicator of Elul for Christ’s Kingdom and a validator of Trumpets a month later.

Dave is going to need a beefy supply of anti-depressants on September 27, which is the day after Trumpets when nothing special except "Special Music" happens here in Wadsworth.

Dear Members of the Headquarters Congregation and Visitors Attending in Wadsworth on The Feast of Trumpets,

Please keep an eye on the back of the room to see if Dave remains in his seat for the entire service. He may pull what he did for the First Day of Unleavened Bread in 2020 by not showing up to the A.M. Service at all or like on many Sabbaths he does not speak, he sneaks out the back kitchen door with “key” men after the sermon starts.

A stealthy way to do this is to excuse yourself to go to the restroom. A quick glance is all you will need to confirm his presence.

;)
Marc

P.S. to the “ministers” at Headquarters: Did I just lie or distort?

Now that the point of Jesus Christ being conceived on Elul 1 was run into the ground, the rest of the message could flow rapidly.

@ 22:39 We’re gonna read a series of verses and I’ll show you something we got wrong.

Who is the “we” he always refers to? “We” should be fired since “we” always seems to be responsible when Dave gets a teaching wrong. It appears that “we” is a bigger pain than I am. Maybe “we” should be demoted in rank and sent out into the field as punishment. Yeah…we.

Skipping forward. Galatians 1:3-4 does actually mean the “evil days” are now and not in some future Kingdom that has been taught with glasses on the table for months.

Bible verses are like Legos to him. He picks the colors and shapes he wants. He fits them together in whatever way he wants. He has the uncanny ability to take an entire box, dump it on the floor, use every single piece, and still manages to make absolutely nothing.

In a couple of hours, he tears the whole thing apart, puts them back in the crate, and hides it under his bed until the next time. That is how Dave uses the Bible.

@ 34:31 We’ve endured for almost two dozen years beatings by evil people who’ve done everything in their power to destroy this Work. Like this whoever this enemy is who's upstairs keeping Mr. Schleifer from being with us. That good man of God who can’t rest partly because, you know, we lost key employees who, when they left, knew it was their own attack on the Work. A husband-wife team.

If you resign from RCG peacefully for prayerful reasons, it will be perceived as an attack. So says the loving servant of God.

Take that as a note for anyone else who ever leaves a “key” position inside RCG. You better pray you are expendable or you may be referenced during one of Dave’s future tirades.

We finally get a new Elijah teaching to move us into the next era of understanding.

@ 37:29 Elijah is a title, brethren.
@ 37:56 …because he speaks God’s words.
@ 38:40 So, I want to remove the Mystery of what it means to be Elijah.

This will be more handily addressed in a future article. How this new teaching “settles in” will say much about the longevity of the announcement.

@ 40:12 We now know that the saints back down through history, right up to those alive today who failed and fell away, they went back to the world, maybe they beat us and went back to the world. They have to be put to death on Day One. They cannot be allowed to enter the Kingdom of God.

@ 40:48 That's why when Christ is gone a long time, He says, "Bring back bring in front of Me those who say, 'We won't have Him reign over us,' and kill 'em right here now."

@ 41:27 Once you have the kingdom of God outta the gate, you cannot let a single wicked saint in. You look at those the evil saints who beat us, here's what God says. Evil means kakos, k-a-k-o-s. And it means, "depraved and injurious." That's what God says of the people who beat us. They're injurious, depraved, people who went back to the world, and it can also mean "useless." They're useless to God. So I wanted that to be clear.

I want that to be clear, as well.

I wonder who exactly the “evil saints” and “wicked saints” are that he is referring to. Dave is yet again being coy about identifying such people during his rants.

The concept of “evil saints” and “wicked saints” never made sense to me while attending RCG. It is not in the Bible. If I recalled the message when Dave coined that term, I am certain I could poke holes in it. But that is speculation.

The last six and half minutes are pretty interesting. I recommend you listen to the whole thing. At double speed, of course. Let's not be unreasonable.

@ 50:31 Now, let’s stop for a moment ‘cause I wanna tell you something else I learned. And it’s given me a peace that only I know…it’s a joy that no man intermeddles with. A personal peace and I’d like to explain it to you. The three Kingdom picture anchored around Trumpets is immutable.

I looked the word up to be sure I understood it correctly.

immutable
“unchanging over time or unable to be changed”

If I have not proven it is very mutable, then I have failed at my primary task. You tell me in the comments.

@ 50:54 I would die before I would give up that truth.

I think he might be serious this time. Unlike when he was being wishy-washy before.

Part 379 – June 25, 2022
@ 18:34 I believe that [Tammuz 1] no less certainly than I believe the seventh day is the Sabbath. That is not one whit stronger belief to me than what we just discovered or that tithing is ten percent or that the Feast is commanded or the Law is in effect. Those are no more certain to me than understanding this Month.

Since Dave did not go back to the Presbyterian church for a Sunday Service before some pork chops and football, I imagine he was only being colorful with his “certainty” rather than being literal.

Rule of thumb: Do not take him at his word. The conviction of his statements fade over time. I have pages and pages worth of quotes to prove this to a court of law if that day ever came.

It is rude to interrupt an apostle when he is being open and honest with the church. Picking up where we left off.

@ 50:54 I would die before I would give up that truth. There is no question the Prophetic Kingdom Solar System we have built is right.

Even if you keep your receipt, there is no refund for that play set when it breaks in about 33-ish more days. You have been warned.

@ 51:10 …my God-appointed task was to end the Mystery of God not, and this took me a long time to understand and I wish I’d seen it before, not to declare the year that God chooses.

Did he just Mike Myers himself? Or did he not-not himself? Like in algebra when two negatives make a positive. Now I’m just being sophomoric.

Okay, his statement is not quite bailing out of the airplane while mid-flight, but it certainly is putting on your parachute pack while sitting next to the door with your eyes on the handle.

@ 51:41 I am not here to declare that the Lord Jesus Christ will come this weekend. It is not my assignment and I never understood it and lemme prove it to you.

Sold. No math or list or proofs needed, Dave. We are ALL on board with this one. It is nothing short of a miracle that this concept could penetrate the collagen and so many more layers of calcium phosphate.

This is big RCG news, folks. For real.

@ 51:49 First, my job is to explain the Mystery of God. Think for a moment, per Revelation 10. “Prophesy again” once the Kingdom comes would certainly not mean to say the date again.

@ 52:41 Therefore, if you’re gonna say the same thing again…it looks like he didn’t say the date the first time either and I won’t do it. And I’m sorry that I ever did. My job is to “make plain,” according to Habakkuk, “the vision of the Kingdom of God.”

Whoa. That is not the same-old, same-old. But yet blended in with some same-old, same-old.

@ 53:47 But it’s not my job to say it is this year. My job is to eliminate the Mystery of God and let God pick His year. Speaking personally, at the very end, you now know this is it has to be the end of the series. No possible way to go on. There’s no time.

I would have liked to have shot my hand straight up in the air and asked, "Mr. Pack? You said you cannot declare it is this year and yet you just said there is no more time for the series to go on. Which is it?”

This is why the members of The Restored Church of God are so confused. In one paragraph, Dave starts by saying he will not declare it is this year, but then four sentences later, says there is no time. Yeah, which is it? Is this a change of doctrine or is it not a change of doctrine? Riding the line between both is unfair and confusing. Take a stand, bro.

@ 54:09 …the men who are close to me know I had an extreme almost just I couldn’t abide the discomfort of having to stand up and declare the year. It’s not my job. My job is to tell you what’s gonna happen. I fell into what Mr. Armstrong did and what the apostles did. You know you want it to be now. You want it to be here or there. 

Which of the enablers at Headquarters shoved Dave’s notes into his hands and pushed on his back to force him to the front of the room to set all the dates that he has?

Maybe it was that bastard “we” who caused all those other problems.

@ 54:54 No wonder I was never able to get the year right.

Well…the last 388 parts of the series did kinda do a little tiny bit more than just “get the year” wrong. But I do not want to kick a man when he is down, especially when he is admitting he was wrong all along.

That is a huge crack in the prophetic facade. Is this Dave 3.0 we are starting to get a glimpse of?

@ 56:35 And I know I’m done. Now, Godspeed this weekend. I can’t imagine even one more year. But the only way this weekend passes is if this is not the year. In a couple three days, God will tell us if it’s the year. Good night.

No snarky comment here.

This is the most contrite I have ever seen David C. Pack be. Maybe he finally gets it. Maybe this will be the beginning of The Restored Church of God returning to what really matters in the Bible and declaring the Gospel of the Kingdom of God once again.

This is the most hopeful turn of events in RCG since the 2015 double-whammy of prophetic fraud.

If anyone asks me if I think he is being sincere, I say, “Yes.” I heard his words and for the record, I believe him. It has been my hope and prayer for years that God would open his eyes to what he has become and what he is teaching.

He is not fully there yet, but it is a huge step in the right direction.

The last few lines of the third Matrix movie come to mind: 

“How long do you think this peace will last?”
“As long as it can.”

Let the peace in RCG last as long as it can.

David C. Pack should now go take his wife on a real vacation.